5 tips for finding the right therapist
You have decided you want to make changes to your life by finding a therapist to help you do that. It is a huge achievement to realize and admit to yourself that you want help dealing with things. Congratulations on taking this first step towards creating the life that you want!
Finding the right therapist can feel intimidating. How do you find someone who you can trust and feel comfortable sharing your feelings and thoughts?
Decide what you are looking for.
Figure out in advance whether you want a therapist who is dynamic and actively engaged or more introverted and quieter. Is it important to you that your therapist matches your identity (gender, ethnicity, culture, sexual orientation)? Can you access the therapist easily (they are located near to where you live or provide telehealth so that you can avoid hassles with traffic, parking, and driving long distances for weekly or every other week appointments)?
Look for a licensed therapist.
Therapists are licensed by the state after obtaining masters or PhD level degrees, completing internships, passing a national exam, and completing several years of practice under supervision by a fully licensed therapist. Be wary of anyone who isn’t licensed by the state, nor has documentation of their advanced degree. Another red flag is someone who is not transparent about billing, confidentiality, and other policies that are in place to protect clients. Therapists are ethically bound to openly communicate these policies with you.
Look for an experienced and seasoned therapist.
A therapist who can see the whole picture of what is going on psychologically, in your relationships, and pays attention to the environmental factors in your life can more accurately assess the situation and help you plan what to work on in therapy. Seasoned therapists have knowledge and experience beyond the minimum years required to be fully licensed. They have continued to take trainings regularly to stay up to date on the latest research on the types of therapy that have been shown to be effective. Seasoned therapists have training on the issues that you are dealing with as well as experience working with people who have struggled with similar issues.
Determine if the therapist could be a good match.
You want to find someone that you are comfortable with, who you feel gets you, is nonjudgmental, that you can trust, and can be honest with you. The best way to get a sense of what therapy would be like with a therapist is to do a phone or video consultation with them. You can ask the therapist about their experience with people who issues similar to yours, training on the issue you want to work on, their therapeutic approach, and whether they provide referrals to other helpful resources.
After you start therapy, give the therapist a chance and trust your instincts.
Even after doing a pre-therapy consultation, it can take a couple sessions for you and your therapist to get to know each other and see if you are a good fit. Signs that sessions are going well are when there is a natural flow of conversation, you feel respected by the therapist addressing your questions, the therapist gets you, you feel comfortable to start sharing information about yourself, and you have a positive connection. A good therapist wants to know what is working in therapy but also when you are not feeling understood. If things feel especially awkward, bring it up. Let your therapist know that you don’t think it will work out with them. Therapists are ethically bound to provide referrals for care and should give you names of some other therapists you can contact. Sometimes it can take a couple tries to find the right therapist and that’s OK. One therapist may not be a good match for you, but it is likely there is another therapist who is the right match with whom you feel comfortable with and can work together towards your goals.